Grand ambitions and wayward dreams
I have decided to change the direction of this column somewhat to encompass more than just writing about parenting. Though this will still be a major part, I will also have stories from my childhood as I did this summer, which garnered a good response as well as some flash fiction.
This may not happen to all stay-at-home-parents, but for me, by the time August rolls around my goose is cooked. I have run out of ideas and the energy to get the kids out of the house for an adventure. The boys seem to think that bickering and fighting is a great way to pass the waning days of summer while I stare at the calendar like a kid waiting for his birthday, fantasizing about all that I am going to get done and be able to do once the boys are in school. I know this will be the case because during those long last weeks the days are never ending, just like when I was a kid in school staring out the window of a stuffy classroom.
Before the school year started I made a list of goals, like put the laundry away right away, keep up with the clutter that materializes on every flat surface, have dinner prepped before the boys get home, go paddle boarding, exercise every day. I saw myself doing yoga in a clutter-free house, because the kids were out of it all day and I had all the time in the world.
We are now three weeks into the school year, and my grand ambitions are mostly wayward dreams—even though I’ve been writing out a list of daily tasks each morning and tell myself I am going to stay focused and get these things done. I do fairly well until high noon and then, due to what is clearly a time paradox that disrupts the space-time continuum, time speeds up and I turn around to see that I need to meet the kids at the bus stop soon. My list is only half finished. I just don’t know where I went wrong. But it is such a nice day outside maybe I’ll go out and lay in the hammock for a bit. I need to take some time for myself anyway. You can’t help others if you can’t help yourself; now, where did I hide those bonbons?